Written by: Dick Lambert
Continuing on from last week’s stripper post of the rules of dating a stripper, this week is about fucking one. What’s it like to bang a stripper, Dick? The first time I had just exit interviewed out of a long relationship, my mates being the mates that they are took me to the local strip club to celebrate my release after serving.
A cute, short, and stacked blond comes by to ask if I want a lap dance. I say no, maybe later. A little later she comes back in a different outfit; now sporting panties, ass-less chaps, and a cowgirl hat with tall black boots. She says “It’s later, lets go.” My friends give me the nod that this one’s on them.
We go to the middle of the lap dance room and she starts grinding away and talking to me. I find out she is from a town not far from me but lives in Hawaii, and she is here to visit her family. We continue talking more all the while she is grinding a little harder on me. The song ends and she continues, not even pausing to ask if I want another dance or not. Another two songs go by and she is really creating a lot of friction between us. I feel her getting warmer and I swear I feel a slight dampness on my leg. She continues to grind until she finally shudders and collapses into me. She says “Thank you,” kisses me on the cheek and then tells me to sit up front for her show.
The show starts and I am up front as requested. She is dressed as a sexy teacher doing a dance to Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher.” She lavishes me during her performance as if it’s my bachelor party. She tells me to wait for her. My friends leave me. She comes out after the place is closed and I am rideless, milling about a little unsure. She wants to go to her hotel so she can change.
At the hotel, I head into the bathroom with the intention of taking a leak. She rushes in and tells me not to waste it, while dragging me into the shower. The water is running and we get naked as the shower is pelting us. She gets on her knees, tells me to piss into her open mouth. Who am I to say no? I piss in her mouth. She tells me over and over she isn’t a slut like a mantra while we have the best stand up shower fuck that I still haven’t come close to topping today.
Not every stripper will have you piss in her mouth as your mileage may vary, but it will likely be a very extreme experience for good or bad. Just go with it. Next week, I will write about the price of dating a stripper. What could be so bad about a girl who lets you golden shower her vocal cords? Just you wait.