Tricked into a Relationship

Posted: 02/25/2011 by Singlefied in Dating, How To
Tags: ,

Check out this conversation I overheard yesterday on the street:

Guy A: “Yo, are you and Kim together now?”

Guy B: “I guess so.  But I wasn’t planning on it.”

Guy A: “She’s like your girlfriend now?”

Guy B: “Yeah.  It looks that way.”

Guy A: “But do you want to be like…in a relationship and shit?”

Guy B: “Not really.  I’m not sure how this all happened.  One day we were casually dating.  Well, basically just fucking.  Then the next, people are calling her my girlfriend.  So I’m like, ok, yeah, girlfriend it is.”

Guy A: “That’s some fucked up shit.”


A lot of you dread the “define the relationship” conversation, so guess what?  Girls got smarter.  Now we just trick your ass into a relationship.  And before you know it, you’re wearing matching sweaters at her aunt’s house for Easter.  By then, it’ll be too late because according to her, you guys will have been bf/gf for 4 months.  If you’re ready for a committed relationship, this is tolerable.  But if you’re not ready, or not ready with that specific girl, you’re in big trouble mister.  Here are some signs in recognizing if you’re a victim of relationship trickery:

– She starts buying you work clothes.   It’s a seemingly sweet gesture, but she’s marking her territory in case any girl coworker asks you where you got that shirt, you’ll have to mention that a girl bought it for you.

– Her friends ask you how things are going between you two.  Frankly, her friends don’t really care but she told her friends to ask you so you involuntarily start defining the relationship.

– Around your friends, she’s extra affectionate.  A girl licking your ear will only prompt your friends to ask what’s going on between you two.  Again, you’re involuntarily defining the relationship.

– She’s very eager to meet your out-of-town friends.  That’s because you have to introduce her and somehow, “This is my girlfriend XXX” might just slip out.  Oops.

– She rapes your Facebook wall.  Sometimes, it’s just about face time.  So, the more you see her name, the more your friends see her name, the more relationship-y you will be perceived.

– Her comments on your Facebook are memories and inside jokes.  Not only does she penetrate your Facebook world, she’s now created a Facebook world for just you two (but for everyone to see).  Be warned, it’s not as obvious as her uploading a picture of you two and commenting on it.  No, she’s not that dumb.  You might simply upload a picture of you snowboarding with your friend Chris, and she’ll whip up some comment like, “Hope you’re wearing your long johns! LOL.  And hey C-Dog!  Can’t wait to party with you and Sam this Fri!  Repeat of last weekend at Boondocks?”

– Her texts are sprinkled with nicknames.  Beyond “hey babe” and “bye sweetie,” she might even bring in “honey” or a nickname she made up for you.  Or, better yet, a nickname for your member down under.  “Babe, bored at work but can’t wait to see you and Robbie Rob Jr later! xoxo”

The main technique of this tricky girl is that she lets other people define you two.  You will find yourself in a committed, monogamous relationship without her ever verbally defining it herself.  Punch her or give her an award for brilliance?  Tough call.


  1. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Ƥƛoʃʃnʁɲɓ, singlefiedyue. singlefiedyue said: 1 in 5 guys are being tricked into a relationship everyday. Are you a victim? […]

  2. Datingisms says:

    […] the “define the relationship” conversation, so guess what?  Girls got smarter.  Now we just trick your ass into a relationship.  And before you know it, you’re wearing matching sweaters at her aunt’s […]

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