iPhone Users are Sluts

Posted: 01/04/2011 by Singlefied in Dating, Sex, Technology
Tags: , , , , ,

In a study conducted by OkCupid, iPhone users get laid more than Blackberry and Android users.  I believe it, here’s why:

ANDROID:  I hear nothing but complaints about Android phones (video freezes, easy to hang up on people, etc) so I presume Android users are usually frustrated and in a pissy mood.  No ass for those bitches.

BLACKBERRY:  Blackberry users are too addicted to their crackberry (it takes one to know one), so they can’t focus on getting laid when they’re obsessing over the flashing red light.   They get some ass because they give off the persona of a successful business person, but at the end of the day, when they can’t keep their eyes off of their BBM, how can they make googly eyes at any human?

IPHONE:  iPhone users like attention.  They like to show off their pretty iPhone along with their dazzling personality.  You can’t get attention sitting at home alone, so, iPhone users are generally more out and about in public.  They’re also good with their fingers (hello, touchscreen), which comes in handy in bed.  Additionally, iPhone users have the best access to the internet, so they can easily get on Singlefied.com for pick-up tips ;).

I do think, though, that iPhone users may also have a tendency to exaggerate to make themselves seem more iPhone-cool-worthy.  I bet some of these iPhoners in the study inflated their numbers!

And in the case of iPhone users in NYC, because AT&T is so bad here, they’re having sex instead of talking on the phone.  Which, btw, should be the case for everybody.

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